Author: Ambre Jade

Once you are Mine

by Ambre Jadein Femdom2 Comments on Once you are Mine

Relationships evolve. There are moments when you outgrow a relationship. Either the Domme or the sub moves on. It happens, just like any other relationship. Like any other relationship, you will have moments when you look back and have some sort of emotional response. As you can well imagine, this is true of a D-s relationship as well, including those that are not necessarily sexual in nature. The D-s relationship is so intimate even without sex. There is a connection that is truly unique when you are owned.

When a Domme truly owns you, when you are Mine, there is no escape. We can go years without interacting and a single word can pass between My lips and you will remember how good it feels to be owned by Me. you mind will flood with memories and the doctrine comes back. The connection is strong and unbreakable. Regardless of other happenings within your existence, you remember being truly owned. you remember that you are truly Mine. Being Mine is a connection that never fades. Time can pass, events can happen but nothing will break the connection of being truly owned by Me. Of being Mine.

It is both a blessing and a curse, as the Domme. While I love total control and complete ownership of you, I try to see Myself as a benevolent force within your being and want you to have certain things. I want you to get what you deserve even if that means I must take a secondary role. I can’t see all My slaves in person and I do not want to not give each individual their time with their Owner. As such, there are times that I, as their Owner, must take a minimal role to ensure that their place is properly represented. Some people need physical interactions, something I am rarely in a position to offer. When such circumstances arise, I try to help guide My slave to finding the right person to do sessions with.

Ultimately though, all slaves come back. Their place is kneeling before Me and they know it. Who could blame them for craving spending more time with Me?!

Know your place but know that sometimes you can have the best of all that is offered once you are Mine!

À bientôt,

Maîtresse Ambre Jade

1 888 726-2447

Oh HELL NO

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought

It seems I spoke too soon with regard to the baths and consent. I suppose there has to be at least one rotten fruit in the barrel. My friend and I were at the baths last night. Yes, on a Tuesday. Yes, we may have a problem. Anyway, at the baths. Now, where my intentions are purely an indulgence in nudity and water, okay, yes and some eye candy. I enjoy watching. So where my intentions are not to hook up, the girlfriend I go with, she is usually on the prowl. It’s great actually! It does however create some confusion among the other bath patrons. They are either thinking we are a couple, or that we are looking for a group experience. Due to the nature of our environment, I can’t blame anyone for misinterpreting our presence.

What I can blame people for… touching without permission. Touching, regardless of how innocent seeming the touch is, requires consent. Again, due to the nature of the environment, I can understand how an individual’s fingers might push the lines of acceptable behaviour and venture into territory they normally would not. Like I said, Can’t blame someone for that. I mean, it’s rude as fuck especially when there has been no forward advances or invitations, but the rooms can be dark and the water concealing so, yeah, no real blame there.

Where the “Oh HELL NO” comes in… when your advances were rejected with a polite wave of the hand, in a clear “not tonight” gesture and while acknowledging my request you back off. But that lasts no more than a moment before you move to sit beside me. Dude, not fucking cool. I get that there are only a few women in the baths that night, and you paid your entrance fees, but that does not mean you are entitled to feast upon the treasures that lay within my body. It’s not for you unless I say yes!

THREE, three, yes let me repeat that three repetitions of “no” occurred, each one brought a few minutes of alone time followed by another unwanted caress. When the fourth incident took place, I had had enough. After verbally smacking him down, with a lecture on appropriate approaches, I left the hot tub and removed myself from the situation, not for my benefit but for his. Another uncalled for touch and violence would have ensued.

Going forward. The situation was not ideal and his complete disregard of my wishes appalling, I cannot think of a way to prevent this from happening again. I mean, yeah, I could tell people to fuck off the moment they make eye contact with me, but that’s not really my style. I can tell you though, going forward, there will be no second chances.

À bientôt,

Ambre Jade

Swingers and Fetishists

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought, Femdom, Fetish 
For the purposes of this article, I am using Fetishist and practitioners of BDSM interchangeably. This is not always the case but in this instance it applies to the BDSM community and fetishist feels like a better word than Domme, sub, Dom, slave, puppy, Owner, Mistress, ... the list goes on. Thus fetishist as the term used here.

It’s interesting. There seems to have always been a certain animosity between swingers and fetishists. Even with a rather significant overlap in behaviours. I was at the swingers’ baths the other night and as usually was having a wonderful time. While I do not see myself as a swinger, it is not really something I participate in, I always enjoy being there. I blame the water 😉 A girlfriend and I were talking about the quasi feud that there seems to be between the two cultures. My friend has been into BDSM longer than I have, and though not currently part of the scene, she was for a long time.

What is it about these two cultures that causes the friction? Swingers and fetishists have a lot in common. Both are seen as deviant behaviour, counter culture. They have their own clubs and gatherings. They have their own rules and behavioural expectations. What is it that keeps them apart?

To figure this out, I went back in time to my first encounter with the notions of swingers and fetishists. The BDSM community is BIG on consent, and if they are not, stay away, but a discussion for another time. Consent is a massive part of the BDSM lifestyle. Why? Because you are electing to either cause or receive pain. This is one of the few places where consent is utilized properly. Where as swingers, without the aspect of pain see consent as a given. Not necessarily a given but they tend to see consent in a way that is comparable to the way the rest of society sees it. It is assumed consent is there.

While I do not feel that my experiences within the swinger baths showed a violation of consent, or that anyone was indulging in something that went beyond what was consensual, there were also no discussions about it. No active informed consent, no consent discussions, no debating or negotiating. The consent was assumed.

Maybe this is key to why the two communities seem at odds. I have to admit, coming from the background I do, my ideals, my views, the lack of these consent discussions were a little shocking. More so when you take into account the consuming of alcohol. What can I say, different strokes. The swinger culture has a sense of freedom that I can’t help but covet. Is it for me? Absolutely not. Could it be in the future? Who knows, sexuality is fluid. The BDSM community has structure, roles, rules and regulations, consent. For now, my sexuality swings (pun totally intended) more toward BDSM and likely always will.

À bientôt,

Ambre Jade

The Domme vs The Mom

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought
Before you begin reading this piece, understand that I am not in anyway referring to the sexual aspects of being a Domme, domgasms and the like but rather the need to control, punish, and power dynamics.

The Domme vs The Mom, coming to you live this Saturday night. Brought to you by … teenagers, fucking with your household’s power structure since (what feels like) the dawn of time. (Read in my best announcer voice!)

Oh the battles that occur within my own mind! The power dynamics within my household are actually far more liberal than people usually expect. I mean, I definitely have my rules and they have to be followed but beyond those, there are few restrictions. The house runs smoothly. Until lately. Lately I have a teenage monster living with me, with his testosterone and teenage mood swing. It has been difficult for both of us to adapt to these new conditions.

My challenge, not being the Domme. One could argue that the roles are similar and there is definitely some cross over but I do not want to dominate my child or his experiences. I am not referring to physical punishments or isolation, things like that, I am referring to aspects of the D-s relationship like complete control, permission to do anything, needing to accomplish things to receive rewards… okay, some of you might be reading this and think, well yeah, that’s a big part of parenting. But for me, it is the mind switch that gets changed over.

The Domme switch in its on position is all about making sure you never question my authority, never question anything that is told to you, you are mine to do with as I please (within sessions and previously discussed informed consent… you know what I mean). The mother switch, also about authority but for different reasons. The descriptions of either archetype are so similar that it is impossible to illustrate through language alone. There is an attitude when dealing with the other half of the relationship and that is the difference. I don’t have any desire to look upon my child as something that I own, that belongs to me. Whereas, a slave, could definitely be seen as an object or possession.

When my household gets rocky, like people not obeying rules or forgetting about chores, not doing school work…. we all know how teenagers are, take your pick of behaviours that would upset the apple cart. When shit is not getting done, I either become nagging, crazy mom or Domme bitch from hell! And while I know several boys and girls that would enjoy the Domme bitch from hell, this is not a situation where I welcome her. On the other side, I hate being the nag. Basically I am running out of archetypes 😉

The most important thing to me, is to not become the Domme when these situations arise. To keep my cool and find different ways to communicate and make my needs and expectations clear without going into a Domme like head space.

I am sure there will be many rematches between the Domme and the Mom but eventually the Mom will win because that’s what I want and as a Domme I always get what I want…. see right there, how they tie in together 😉

À bientôt

Ambre Jade

Femdom Life Coaching: A holistic approach to Female Domination

by Ambre Jadein Femdom, Life Coaching, Sessions1 Comment on Femdom Life Coaching: A holistic approach to Female Domination

My approach to Female Domination has always been very holistic. I strive to impact not just your sexuality but other aspects of your existence as well. Femdom Life Coaching is the best term to describe My intentions. The creation of a plan for slaves and submissives whether they are proponents of My doctrine or not. The idea is that your devotion to Female Domination should have an influence in your every day life. We are not always prepared to serve in a holistic fashion. There is a focus on sex, and orgasms, and kink distractions. But Femdom is about more than that for many. It should be a way of life, a way of being. Life coaching is about being in the present, about influencing your present to attain a specific goal. Who better to help you on that journey than a Domme? Femdom Life Coaching creates an environment where both your sexual self and your being can grow.

Femdom Life Coaching can include:

  • Exploration of new fetishes
  • Finding ways to express your devotion without compromising current relationships
  • Creating a daily routine that works and you can stick to
  • Learning to approach Dommes
  • Learning to work with the right Domme
  • Finding your hang ups with complete devotion
  • Coming to terms with your reality
  • Fitness and healthy habits
  • Financial budgeting and Domination
  • Homework
  • Self reflection
  • the list goes on…

The possibilities are truly endless. To celebrate My newest approach to Femdom and embracing Femdom Life Coaching, I will be creating a twelve week program for those wanting to New Year on the right foot.

Femdom Life Coaching sessions are different from Femdom sessions in that they are not focused on you pleasing Me. This is about you learning to find the right ways to please a Domme that work well for both parties. These sessions can be done via phone, text, or cam.

My goal is to be a benevolent force within your existence. Someone who can both dominate and help simultaneously to create an atmosphere in which you can flourish as a submissive, slave or other.

À bientôt,

Maîtresse Ambre Jade

1 888 726-2447

Weekly Hypnotic Task One

by Ambre Jadein Hypnosis1 Comment on Weekly Hypnotic Task One

I will be releasing a new weekly hypnotic task every Monday from today forward. These tasks will vary in how they are to presented to you, ie audio, video, written. Each will have a specific goal in mind, and depending on My mood I will share it with you.

These tasks will involve a sacrifice, your time, physical discomfort,etc. The weekly hypnotic task will cut into various parts of your existence. It is not about forcing you to “out” yourself but rather to find ways to express your devotion within more parts of your life than just when you have some free time.

Hypnotic Task One

your first task is simple. Not too taxing. I would like you to find five minutes, yes only five minutes, where you can be completely alone, and silent. I want you to set a timer, for five minutes. Nudity is recommended, though not absolutely necessary at this stage in your training. you will kneel, on the ground. This will likely cause some discomfort and eventually some aching. This is the sacrifice involved.

During your five minutes, I want you to empty your mind of everything. The silence and stillness of your mind is what I am after for this exercise. Breath through your abdomen. Expand and contract with every breathe and clear your mind.

This will be difficult. The clearing of your mind. Five minutes is not a long time and if you can do more, I encourage you to do so. Five minutes is the minimum. This will be done daily for a week. you will find your moment and while it will not be focused on Me, you will get your mind ready for potential programming by Me.

Alternative: For those of you who are not capable of kneeling for five minutes. If you can, work toward kneeling but should that not be possible sit on the floor crossed legged or lay on your back. This should be done on the floor. If there are medical conditions that prevent you from being on the floor, your bed is an acceptable alternative. Key word here being medical conditions!

I would love to hear how this week progresses for you.

À bientôt,

Goddess Ambre Jade

A Night at the Baths

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought1 Comment on A Night at the Baths

I spend a fair amount of time talking, researching, writing about sex, sexuality and D-s relationships. My hands on experiences have been rather limited lately. My time has been divided between mental health sessions, parenting, my lover, writing, etc. As you can easily see, I am a busy woman. Anyway, so not much hands on time lately. While I not really feel I am missing much at the moment, it is still good to explore. So this weekend, a girlfriend took me out to one of the local baths.

While this is not something I have done in the past, and I am usually not very good with new experiences, this was great. While I am not a proponent of the swinging lifestyle, I have no qualms with those that are, and support their expression of sexuality and their experience. I am very glad that I went. While I did not engage in anything sexual, my choice, it was quite pleasant to see people free to express their sexual selves in a somewhat public manner.

Also, I just love being naked. As a Domme, I am rarely nude. I don’t feel that nudity is part of my identity as a Domme. I much prefer CFNM but the rest of my identity is definitely a nudist. It have to say it was quite nice sitting in the hot tub completely naked, everyone around us doing the same. While I don’t necessarily see nudity as sexual (more on that in a future post), the sexual undertones of the environment were hard to ignore. Porn was playing on TV screens, which I happily could have gone without but that’s the nature of the thing…

It was really nice to enjoy the environment we were in. While it would have been nice to have a slave or two with us during that adventure, that would have meant I would not have enjoyed the sensations of water on my naked skin. More on my adventures at the baths coming up.

À bientôt,

Ambre Jade

Emotional Fluctuations

by Ambre Jadein Hypnosis, Life Coaching1 Comment on Emotional Fluctuations

Having just come out of a rather turbulent emotional roller-coaster, and its effects still clear in My mind, I decide to go over some of the emotional fluctuations that can potentially occur when you submit to erotic hypnosis. Like anything, there are various levels of submission and you might find that you are not as emotionally impacted as others. For this post, I am making a distinction between submission for a session and submission to a Goddess or Domme. Both are extremely powerful and both have different effects.

Emotional fluctuations can vary from one person to the next, and one session to the next. Emotional fluctuations can be different depending on who you are submitting to, or the nature of the sessions. We live in a world where emotional fluctuations are generally seen as negative. I rarely, if ever, see an emotional response as a negative, including My Own emotions. I could go on about emotions forever, but right now we are focusing on the emotional fluctuations that can happen during erotic hypnosis sessions. This list is by no means, complete. There are an almost infinite number of possible emotional responses. The intensity can vary from person to person, experience to experience, day to day.

Top Five Emotional Fluctuations During Erotic Hypnosis

  1. Lust to Love
  2. Desire to Resentment
  3. Love to Devotion
  4. submission to slavery
  5. Fear to Eroticism

1. Lust to Love:

Erotic hypnosis almost by its very nature is about lust. Sexual energy is high. Lust for both the experience and the Domme. Over time (sometimes through a single session) that lust evolves to love. True love? Not likely but love none the less. Where once you may have objectified your Goddess, it is replaced by a new found respect and care for Her on a deeper level than you were expecting. On a side note, this emotional fluctuation can occur even before a session. This is easily the most common fluctuation. I always find it interesting to watch this occur between subject and HypnoDomme. Even when I am not involved and watching from the outside.

This is one of the emotional fluctuations that rarely revert back. Chances are you will always love Her. It may lessen in intensity, or you may come to see it as “two ships passing in the night” but the love will always be there in some form or another.

2. Desire to Resentment:

I struggled with the decision to add this emotional fluctuation. It is rather negative but with the right Domme, such emotional changes will be perceived before they become an issue or She will use this change to plant the seeds for further transformation. There are moments when a submissive may find themselves resenting their Goddess. Not for something She has said or done, but rather the level of control She has over their existence. I see this as a natural progression to devotion. Resentment shows that there is an understanding as to how intense the HypnoDomme-subject relationship can actually be. Do not feel discouraged either as the subject or the Domme when this fluctuation occurs.

This is an example of an emotional fluctuation that must be an evolution of the relationship. It ends in one of two ways. 1) The resentment is dispelled as the subject accepts the control She has over them. 2) The relationship ends. This is by no means a reflection of the Hypnotist’s skill but rather a manifestation of how far the subject was willing to let the relationship go. It could be that the subject was not yet at the point in their life where this intensity was an acceptable part of their life.

3. Love to Devotion:

This transformation is My favourite. This is when a subject transcends love. Devotion is a different, deeper level of love. If you have read My Domme as a Leader piece, you may understand more of what I mean. This is when other emotional responses start to dissipate. The biggest one I notice, is jealousy. Can you really be devoted to someone if you spend more time being jealous than devoted? No, you can’t. This is where you start to see yourself as an extension of your Goddess and Her experiences. When Her happiness is truly your happiness. Many claim to be at this juncture in their relationships but they are still a little shy of the truest expression of devotion, more on that another time.

4. submissive to slave:

One of the more subtle of the emotional fluctuations, a transformation from submissive to slave, at least as per My definition. Not everyone will agree that this is an emotional change but rather a change in lifestyle choice. While I agree to a certain extent, there are emotions that are present in a submissive that are not part of the slave interaction and vise versa. A slave is a complete loss of the self, you belong, you are owned. There are a multitude of emotional transitions there. Those who have witnessed this change will know what I mean.

5. Fear to Eroticism:

I have spent quite some time describing this emotional fluctuation, so I won’t get too much into it. But as you can imagine this is an intense emotional fluctuation that is undervalued.

There are many more emotional fluctuations, I am sure you have experienced some that are not mentioned here. Share in the comments or privately.

À bientôt,

Goddess Ambre Jade

Orgasms, Orgasms, Orgasms

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought

A late night posting tonight. I was a rather busy woman today and recovering from a rather intense reunion with my lover. It had been two weeks (I had strep and didn’t leave my bed and not in a fun way). My lover’s thing is making me cum. As a Domme, pro or lifestyle, I do not let my submissives experience my orgasms. Well, I should say, I rarely let my submissives experience my orgasms. It find it very freeing that I can share these moments with him. Anyway, back to the subject at hand, well his hand more specifically.

He loves making me cum. He can spend hours making me cum without so much as an orgasm for himself. It’s a wonderful quality to have in a lover. There should be more people like that. Thing is, we don’t need hours. There is something about our chemistry together that has me shrieking within moments, squirting within a few minutes. It’s quite crazy actually. I have never really had a lover like that before. Not to say that I don’t orgasm, just not at this frequency or such short intervals.

I lost count last night. The number of orgasms surpassed the point where I could count. He couldn’t count them either, which means it was over 25. All this to say, I am a very tired Domme.

À bientôt

Ambre Jade

How To Triage a Fuck

by Ambre Jadein Domme Thought

A girlfriend and I were having a talk last night. She spent a night with a new lover. Has potential right? Wrong, apparently it was not so good. The question came up on how one can triage their potential sexual experience later. I am not talking about a relationship here. I am talking about sex, one night stands, an experience purely for the carnal desires that require little to no intimacy.

I am not really a one night stand kind of woman. I have those moments, the ones where a girl just wants to get laid. I have enjoyed them in the past and will likely enjoy them again in the future. My friend desires sex, just fucking, nothing more nothing less. Just a good time bathing in the sexual experience. No strings, no obligations, just a night shared.

Her rather bland, boring, not so exciting experiences this weekend prompted the question

How does one triage a potential fuck? And how should they be vetted?

The vetting or evaluation process is subjective. Every one has different desires and criteria. More on this in the future. Where was I? Triage… a system that will allow a person insight into whether or not this particular dance partner is one worth taking time for. It’s intuitive for me. I have shitty sex once in my life and it is not an experience I care to repeat, so I feel her pain. The problem is my triage process, completely intuitive. I have no idea how I know my lovers or potential lovers have the ability to satisfy me. It just happens that way. The question did allow me some moments of reflection. It is not something I look at often. I take this ability for granted when really, I should be celebrating it. As I ask around, it seems to be a rare gift.

I connect experiences and random facts I have learned about the person, either through their own admission or from others. These connections are not obvious nor are they always conscious. I just read people quite well, probably why I am so good at my job. So how does one know their sights are set to the right person?

So my friend and I talked and though no clear way to triage a potential fuck came from it, I did from some conclusions on what NOT to do.

  1. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Do not get distracted by the physical. Just because some little individual is gorgeous, it does not mean their performance will be worth it.
  2. Don’t expect them to read your mind. If this is someone who has difficulty communicating or you, yourself have difficulty communication your desires make sure there is some way for them to know what you want. This does not mean just vocalization but body language or movements.
  3. Don’t ignore the way they walk. I can tell a lot about a person by the way they walk. Confidence vs ego, determination vs blasé. Though this is not a clear picture it can be an indicator.

This all depends on the kind of fuck you are looking for. If you are looking merely for a distraction and experience beyond that is not important, then triage is not necessary. I believe the most important key is making sure you know what you want from your escapade. As well as, being able to communicate that.

I was hoping this would be more concrete, with clear methods of triage. The reality is, it is difficult to determine how someone will be while fucking and my magical spidey senses are not a common skill and I should consider myself lucky.

À bientôt,

Ambre Jade